1. The Good Wife Is Bad.


    Date: 12/19/2017, Categories: Reluctance, Author: Lauradj, Source: LushStories

    “Derek, stop calling me,” I told him on the other end. The constant ringing of my phone was really starting to irritate me. If I ignored his calls, he started texting and if I ignored the texts then he went back to ringing me. After three hours of playing his stupid game, I gave in and answered. “I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately,” he said. “All the time in fact.” “You can’t keep ringing me, especially at home, it’s dangerous,” I replied, ignoring his comment, though it touched something within me. I knew that Bryan thought about me all the time, I was his wife, but whether he thought about me as Derek did was another thing. “Okay then, so let's meet up and talk,” suggested Derek. “I can’t keep making up excuses and events that take me out of the house, Bryan might become suspicious and wonder where I am.” “So then we do it during work hours,” he said. “I’m not about to play hooky from work so I can meet up with my husband’s best friend. Just stop, please Derek.” “I’ll keep ringing you, Janet. I don’t care if it’s midday or midnight. I’ll keep ringing,” he told me. As annoying and frustrating as that sounded, I secretly wanted him to ring me constantly. I found myself increasingly addicted to Derek - he was intoxicating and powerful, mind-altering even, but it was dangerous. He was like a drug to me; I knew it was bad and dangerous, but I still craved and wanted him. The more I told myself no, the more my body was saying yes, screaming yes even. Derek was charming ...
    and he was a smooth talker, I found it hard to say no to him, but I also let him talk me into these situations, no matter how reluctant I was, I let Derek led me into these situations. “Fine,” I grudgingly told him. “We can meet up during my lunch hour for a chat. But that is it, just talking, no sex.” On the other end, Derek chuckled. “If it makes you feel better you tell yourself that, but you and I both know what the outcome will be.” For the rest of the weekend, my husband Bryan noticed that I was in an odd mood. He kept asking me if I was okay. He was being so nice to me and I snapped and yelled at him, told him to stop asking me how I was and if I was okay. Poor, nice, considerate Bryan who was just trying to make sure that everything was okay with me and I bit his head off and snapped at him. Half an hour later I apologized repeatedly to Bryan. I made love to him, as a way to make up for being a bitch to him. But it wasn’t the same as it was with Derek. It wasn’t exhilarating or dangerous. The excitement came from the fact that I was doing something I shouldn’t with my husband’s best friend. After the guilt of what I was doing wore off, I tried to justify my actions, telling myself that this could be good for me, good for my marriage. My God , I thought with a sickening sort of realization , I am addicted to Derek, he is my drug . This is what it must be like for addicts, guilty feelings and then justification . But despite all my feelings of guilt and remorse and ...
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